Saturday, July 08, 2006

BREAKING NEWS: E may not equal MC2!!

So, I was on my way down to WalMart to get some Massengil when I'm stuck at the train tracks because this freight train was taking FOR-FUCKING-EVER. And I see this guy.

And I'm conflicted.

Part of me wants to run this ass-clown down for basically calling me a dick (yea, I'm taking the sign personally) and part of me wants to give him money because it says "God Bless" on the sign. But I'm not giving him shit because he didn't capitalize the G in God and so that's how I can justify why I'm not giving him anything but a dirty look and the finger as soon as traffic starts moving again (hey, I'm not as stupid as I look but who could be).

So me and T are taking a break from the corndog stand this weekend. We basically need to hose it down and air it out after last weekend's Festival. But its good because it gives us time to work on our new project. T entered us in the 2006 corndog festival contest where you make a scene out of nothing but corndogs. It can be anything. Last year, we came in third with our rendition of "Neverland". We should have won. But apparently our "corndog children" weren't realistic enough because they weren't anatomically correct. Give me a fucking break. T said we're putting penises (or is more than one penis, penii?) on EVERYTHING this year.


And you may ask yourself, "why hasn't T been posting lately." I'll tell you why. This man is so driven about this contest. He's not himself at all. He just sits on the hood of the pinto sketching out our "master plan" and thinking about what we are going to enter into the contest this year. He's hunkered down. He's not eating. He's not tapping my ass. I even heard him mumble something about how Einstein was full of shit and that E does NOT equal MC2. And if it doesn't...that means we have to change how we make our corndog batter because we based it mainly on the theory of relativity.


Kim said...

I would have run him over then given him the money. It's only fair.

LadyJane said...

Reminds me of this one guy I saw downtown Vancouver. His sign said "need money for pot." I really admired his honesty.

Still didn't give the lazy fucker any of my cash. I need it for pot!

Anonymous said...

Gravity is like heavy man.

Anonymous said...

Not as heavy as that corndog batter, dude!

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