Sunday, June 25, 2006

I love this town and oh yea, Jimmy is MIA

You know, just when you think you want to pack up the corndog trailer and the pinto and start fresh....you see things like this that really make you realize there's no place like home. And of course as soon as we saw the sign, we looked at each other, smiled and T pulled a u-ey so fast I actually spilled my beer. That there is the worst form of alcohol abuse!

We had a great night. I got drunk and danced my ass off for T to all his favorite songs on the jukebox..then decided to give him a lapdance in the corner of the bar to this song (it's called "get inside" by Johnny A..I thought I was being sooo fucking coy with that one..yea, baby...get inside..get inside ME..you know you want to..).

The only thing is, in hindsight...why is it I feel compelled to:

1. sing into my bud bottle
AND
2. Hold it up over my head like the fucking statue of liberty when I dance.

At the time, I'm the sexiest motherfucker this side of the equator. And yet, the next day....there is this sense of shame.

But get this...so we saw Jimmy in the parking lot on the way home and he was still complaining about how that vision of a monster pig eating Jesus was haunting him. So T said, "c'mon with us and we'll drive the pinto to the top of that hill where we can latch onto someone's wi-fi and I'll show you something to get that vision out of your head". I figured we were gonna go look at porn.

Anyway make a long story short, we showed him this video and me and T were laughing so hard by the end of the video that we barely realized that the pinto door was open and Jimmy was gone. Then again, maybe we just told him to leave. It's really just a blur for me. But I think he's missing. If you have a sighting, please call: 1-334-756-3336.



7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Brilliant! How do you consistently come up with this material?

Anonymous said...

Oh, come on, that was mean. Now Jimmy is out somewhere looking for that red bus that ran over Jesus. You just wait, there'll soon be reports about red buses getting torched all over the place.

And we'll know just who to blame. ;)

~tarjamarja

spankcheeks said...

You know, that "sense of shame" seems to haunt me wherever I go...

thanks for putting me up, T and Z!

xoxo cheeks

Kevin Lauer said...

The expressions by the onlookers are priceless.

Anonymous said...

That was just so wrong, I of course loved it.

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